What? Your Blog is Evolving!

Here's some news to all you dear readers. After some consideration, I'm moving my blogging activities to a WordPress site. It'll still be the same mediocre content you've come to appreciate from me, but the site will look just a tad nicer.

My new site's name is The Knobbles Blog, and you can find it at knobbles.wordpress.com. Why the name change? It's part of something new I'm trying where I'm creating one online presence across all my creative outlets. It's also a smidgen less confusing than the Loner & Friends name. This will also be coming with a YouTube channel I'm putting together. I may also be putting more content in more places, so stay tuned to the WordPress site.

 Furthermore, I'll be adding all my old posts to the new site with their original post dates. The only caveat is that none of your comments will transfer, which is a major bummer. However, I still think the transfer is worth it. If there is a way to transfer comments, PLEASE let me know; I'd love to keep them!

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH for the past year and a half. Your views, comments and feedback has been invaluable in my development as a writer. I sincerely hope you continue to check out my new content on the new site.

If any of the above changes, you all will be the first to know. Thanks for understanding. For other updates, follow me on Twitter @MaybeNotPayton.

-Payton Knobeloch

Our Abusive Relationships with Games

To my roommate Michael,

What happened? You haven't been the same since she came into your life. You used to be so carefree and easygoing; now you're as on-edge as ever, just waiting at her beck and call. I can see it. The more time you spend with her, the more I see hope and joy leave your eyes.

It's sad. I wish she could bring us back the old you.

***

I'm sorry you had to see that, but it needed to be said. For the past few days, my roommate has been stuck in a relationship - one that would confuse most, but entice others. It's a destructive and abusive relationship with a certain woman. Her name? Lightning...something.

McQueen?

Yes, you read that correctly: My roommate is in an abusive relationship with Lightning Returns: Final Fantasy XIII. Now, before we hurt ourselves contemplating the absurdity of this game's title, or even the fact that it's the third installment in a series branching off from the thirteenth installment in a series, allow me to explain myself.

He recently began the game, and he's only come up for air a couple times. Normally, I'd say "All the power to him," if it was for a game with an engaging story, furious action or any other addictive qualities. However, from what I've seen (lord knows he won't let anyone else play it), LR:FFXIII is not one of those games. What I have seen is this: You play as Lightning, an android who's discovered that she's pretty much Jesus (in that you work for God - yes, the characters refer to him as God, capital "G"), and you're tasked with saving people's souls before the end of days hits (if I use too many italics, understand that it represents how ridiculous this thing is).

Other than the combat, the game appears to be a total mess (again, appears - I haven't been able to try it myself). Walls of text constantly appear as tutorials for new mechanics. Much of the time playing is spent customizing Lightning with clothes designed in the mindset of, "How little material can we put on her before it physically falls off?" My biggest issue is that the game lets you play so little, because it's more interested in shoving its clumsily told story in your face. To put it bluntly, I sunk a decent amount of time into the first Final Fantasy XIII (read that statement again if you need to), and I have absolutely no idea what's happening in the new one.

I'm all for complex stories. One of my favorite comic series will always be Geoff Johns' run on Green Lantern. In a time where other series would generally try to be accessible to new readers, GL thrived on backstory and an expanded universe. This worked because new elements were introduced gradually and given time to find their footing. In LR:FFXIII, exposition is constantly being dumped on other exposition, and nothing feels organic or cohesive.

And yet, despite all these flaws (or outright problems), my roommate can't get enough. In fact, he'll yell at you if you hint at any possible flaws in the game. So, if we want to connect our relationships with games to our relationships with other people, where does he fall on the spectrum? Candy Crush Saga is the hit-it-and-quit-it fling. Grand Theft Auto V is the bad boy with the really big...game map. Gone Home is the under-appreciated artsy person. I'd say that Lightning Returns: Final Fantasy XIII is the abusive, Chris Brown relationship*. Even though it isn't good for him, my roommate always finds a reason to come back. Because my roommate is actually Rihanna.

And someone always ends up regretfully watching Battle of the Year.

Much of this isn't that different from today's release of South Park: The Stick of Truth. The reviews have been quite positive, actually, saying that the humor is on point with the show and that the gameplay can be pretty fun. However, a few of them (Kotaku's and Rev3Games' reviews in particular) described major technical problems, glitches, and even game-breaking bugs.

How did commenters react? Not well. It seemed that at any hint of this much anticipated game (I've certainly been looking forward to it) not being completely amazing, the pitchforks and torches would come out. So many people were ready and willing to defend this game that had just barely released (I can only assume most of them had yet to play it when they posted) that they were willing to get pretty nasty toward any negative speech.

Where does this leave us? Why do many of us act as the sworn protectors of games that clearly aren't as sterling on paper as they are in our minds? I honestly don't know. Perhaps we have some sense of loyalty to a franchise, like Final Fantasy and South Park. Those characters and stories have been good to us in the past, so we feel like we need to reciprocate.

Or, you know, maybe it's just Stockholm Syndrome.

Have you ever been stuck in an abusive relationship with a game? What was it? Why do you think we're so defensive of games (or other media) that just aren't very good? Or am I just full of crap? Please let me know in the comments! I'm really interested what you guys have to say on the subject.

[*No, domestic abuse isn't funny. However, this analogy seemed to work pretty well. Besides, Rihanna's with that guy from Degrassi now, so I'm sure it's cool to say whatever. Don't take anything I say too personally.]

The Lego Movie Review: Everything is Awesome

The Lego Movie shouldn't be good. It's one of those movies that seems destined to be a desperate cash grab/two-hour commercial. It's supposed to be obnoxious and loud and pandering. It's supposed to be so bogged down with big-name screen actors in lieu of actual voice talent that it sounds terrible.

The Lego Movie is not good. It's awesome.

What a twist.

Okay, that was a pretty lame way to start a review. But as soon as you dive into The Lego Movie, you'll be more than willing to join in using its favorite word. They even wrote a song about it.

It's one of those movies that can change your entire mood in a couple hours - it's in that same camp as Singin' in the Rain or The Muppets. I was really grasping for something to dislike about it, and I guess it could do without ten or so minutes. But...eh.

Otherwise, Lego is way better than it has any right to be. My biggest concern going into it was how it would use the hundreds of Lego brands and third-party franchises. Fortunately, it all goes pretty smoothly. Popular characters more relevant to the story, like Batman, aren't treated with the "oh, look who we got the rights to" attitude you'd expect. They're just as important as everyone else and no more. Lego also gives some much appreciated references to classic moments in Lego's history. The movie comes at you like, "Did you forget about Bionicle and that time we were, like, all about sports? Because we didn't."

Ooh. Right in the childhood.

You could argue that the voice casting dips a bit into "name that actor" territory that so many other animated films inhabit. Yet, Lego keeps such a brisk pace when it comes to introducing and referencing the characters you probably won't notice. Everyone does a pretty great job, too; it's nothing revolutionary, but they all do well.

Weirdly enough, Lego is one of the most cleverly written movies I've seen in a while. It has a consistent delivery of great jokes other comedies hope for. It's not difficult to see how this came from the team behind the excellent 21 Jump Street reboot. That being said, the majority of the humor is obviously aimed at adults. This is not to suggest the jokes are explicit or inappropriate - they're not - but kids probably won't catch everything. But let's be honest: this movie isn't for kids, it's for us.

You have no business here.

My favorite aspect of Lego is easily the animation. It uses a combination of CGI and stop motion, but it ultimately always looks like stop motion - and it's beautiful. This might as well be the best Lego fan film ever made, and I say that endearingly. There's some crazy detail on display here; even the CG animation is designed to showcase characters' textures, flaws in painting, scratches in cracks, and fingerprints. There are friggin' fingerprints animated onto the characters.

Unless you've never felt the joy of constructing a set, or the heartbreak and despair of stepping on a brick, or the hatred for other human beings felt when they just don't get your Lego design (as expertly portrayed in the movie), I can't recommend The Lego Movie enough. It's the best possible outcome for a movie based on a product, all wrapped up with beautiful animation and a pleasant story told by a solid cast. It's been a few hours since I saw it, and I'm still pretty jazzed about the whole situation. Everything is indeed awesome.

Oculus Rift: More Than Just Fun and Flirty Eyewear

Yesterday was pretty cool. I made some oven pizza, got frivolous on Amazon, and, thanks to a friend of a friend, was able to try out the new Oculus Rift. For those of you who don't know, the Oculus is basically our biggest step toward virtual reality. And dang, it's...sexy?

Check out those curves. So streamlined.

You strap it on, put on headphones and grab a controller - simple (?) as that. At the moment, the Oculus is in the development stage, so there aren't many games or uses for it yet; but I assume they're coming, just like a few aesthetic and functional improvements to the device. The few demos I tried and others I watched my friends play were impressive enough to get us acquainted with the device.

The Oculus is like Six Flags, in that roller coasters are a good way to get acclimated. While my friends rode through some very simple demos, I partook in a rather complicated Mayan temple, Indiana Jones-esque ride. It was a great demonstration of how the Oculus worked: Bend over the railing to look down into the abyss, look behind you at one point to find the boulder from Raiders chasing after you, stuff like that.

Next was not only a good use of the Rift, but a solid idea for an indie game. It was a first-person four-player shooter that you...play by yourself. Walk into the arena (a very massive box with a Mirror's Edge feel), shoot floating cubes to get points, and then do it all again. But each time after, you take the perspective of a different version of your first character, and then you play the arena while your first "self" goes through a recording of your first go. It's a nice idea, and it's one that's more fun than a usual tech demo.

Speaking of absolute tech demos, I watched a friend play through a game with one objective: sit in an office and keep both control keys pressed down on your virtual laptop. It sounds simple until the Oculus throws up the illusion of flies buzzing around your head, knives falling just next to your "arms," a spider crawling up your arm and into your head, and, uh, a raptor. It's all very sound-heavy, showing the vital importance of having a decent headset.

I saw both a horror demo and a skydiving demo, but neither was as impressive as the last demo I played: a detailed re-creation of the "DK Mountain" track from Mario Kart: Double Dash!!. I was completely taken aback when I jumped "inside" the Mushroom Kingdom. The other Oculus games were interesting, but nothing else popped like the familiar music and the distinctive designs of the track. I was happy to find there wasn't a time limit or other racers, because I had an amazing time just taking in everything around me. And listening to the music. Dancing took place.

Unfortunately, despite how fun some of the demos were, the Oculus Rift feels less like a complete console and more like the first step toward a complete experience. To reach that comprehensive idea, a few things need to happen first. First off is the screen inside the Oculus headset. The one I used was of a considerably low resolution and was easily smudged, which take the focus off the game and can even be headache inducing. Speaking of focus, the headset can be difficult to position so it's actually in focus. Again, headaches. Lastly, I think the Rift would strongly benefit from getting rid of the wires. When you're constantly turning around and moving, stuff gets tangled.

My roommate asked me if the Oculus was the future of gaming. It's not. It's a future of gaming. There's huge potential here for experimental gaming, and I'm really excited to see what happens.

But for real though, Nintendo. Let's see some Oculus Mario Kart. Get on that.

The "Things I Really Liked That Happened to Come Out In 2013" List

Happy 2014, everyone! It's a time for new beginnings, new goals, and the realization that probably nothing will be different in your life just because the calendar changed. And since that's way too much happiness for my taste, I'd like to immediately remind you of the past year's heartbreaks and regrets, with my list of things I really liked that happened to come out in 2013. Keep in mind, this is not a "Top X" list, because this is not Buzzfeed and I actually respect my readers. I also had no way to consume EVERY PIECE OF CONTENT in the past 365 days, so my list is in no way definitive.

I'm going to post these periodically, starting with the medium I have the least authority to judge and going from there. Remember, these are alphabetical order, except for the last item on the list, which is my favorite for the year.

Television

Attack on Titan

If you're like me, you don't watch much anime. So much of it is way too out there for me to follow, and it gets just as convoluted and referential as a Rick Remender comic. Yet, I thought I'd give Attack on Titan a try, simply because I had free time once and wanted to try something new. I'm so glad I did. Even though I'm just over halfway done with Attack, I'm happy to give it a solid recommendation. It's a really cool premise that's just original enough for me not to have seen it before. It could use a bit more action, but if you're looking for an accessible anime that isn't too long and will keep your attention, you could do worse than this giant monster fighting epic. You can also watch it now for free, so that's cool too.

Breaking Bad

May it rest in peace. Breaking Bad was one of those shows where you could binge watch all five seasons or anticipate it week after week and enjoy it just the same. And this final season was...fantastic. There's no point in trying to tiptoe around spoilers when describing those last eight episodes, so if you haven't seen this show yet, do that now. Otherwise, you're missing out on one of the most masterfully crafted series in history, and definitely the best one I've ever seen.

Orange is the New Black

This one doesn't have the epic feel of the last two, but it can be just as compelling. It's a Netflix-produced and -distributed comedy/drama about the hierarchy of a women's correctional facility. I know that doesn't sound like the coolest thing ever, but it turns out to be well worth your time. This was one of the shows that crept up on me; I never thought about how much I enjoyed it until I realized I was nine episodes in. If you have some time over the holiday break, you could do much worse than Orange is the New Black.


Favorite of 2013: Arrow

The first season of Arrow was something of a guilty pleasure. It didn't have the best actors or the highest production value or the most intricate stories. But it had a good enough onscreen realizations of the DC Comics characters to keep me watching, and I'm so glad I did. Season 2 has really come into its own, and it's grown into this legitimately great series. This is the show I anticipate every week. This is the show I drop everything to watch on Wednesday nights. This is my show. So shut up already about its awful ad campaign.

Knowing your audience?

Music

I have to say, I was a little disappointed with this year's music. Sure, plenty of it was okay, but very little of it stood out to me as truly profound stuff. Way too much of it relished in the trends of 2013, like songs that gave artist credit to arrangers rather than performers; and let's not forget all the songs that begin quietly but then ramp up with the help of a bass drum. 

Again, I wasn't able to listen to every single album from 2013, but apps like Spotify do much of the heavy lifting.

Lorde, Pure Heroine

Even if you're tired by now of the radio's obsession with "AND WE'LL NEVER BE ROOOOOYAAAAALS," please give this album a try. Lorde's eccentric voice is enough of a draw already, but the vulnerability and accessibility of her lyrics are really refreshing when compared to the other material pop music is pumping out. And Lorde herself just seems to not give a crap, so that's cool.

Standout song: "Team"

Favorite of 2013: Vampire Weekend, Modern Vampires of the City

If Pure Heroine was about embracing the grounded reality of the teenage years, Modern Vampires is about growing up. Even though Vampire Weekend's previous two albums are among my favorites, at times they seemed a bit juvenile, focusing on the struggles of being a wealthy college kid from New England. It's nice to see the band "come of age," in a sense, and watch their horizons expand. And it's some of the most beautifully (yes, that's specifically the word I'd like to use) written music I've heard from a band in some time. Not "inventive" or "avant garde," but beautiful.

Standout song: "Hannah Hunt"

Anti Album of the Year: Kanye West, Yeezus

Yes, I know I'm not the go-to expert for rap or hip-hop (people tell me they're different things). However, when an album receives heavy attention - like album of the year attention - I look up from my indie record that's much cooler than yours. This year, that album was Yeezus. And boy did it suck. Yes, I know Kanye is a blithering idiot whose rapping skills are debatable, but I was willing to give this one a listen. It's a mind-numbing slog that all starts to blend together after a while. Everything is distorted to oblivion, and the lyricism all revolves around the tired notion of, "Man, I sure feel sorry for Kanye West - he has it rough." If you have an hour of your life you'd like to waste, Yeezus should do the trick.

Standout song: This uncomfortable joke

Comics

Batman

Batman's origin story is like an oral folktale. It's been passed down and retold so many times in so many different ways that it changes somewhat, but its main message stays the same. I groaned a little at the thought of DC reissuing the Dark Knight's beginnings again with "Zero Year"; but I was very pleasantly surprised to find it didn't suck. In fact, it's quite good. Scott Snyder and Greg Capullo have used 2013 (with a little help from DC's love of events) to present Batman's first year of crime fighting in a fresh new way. Snyder's thoughtful writing gets to really shine in this series; he makes "Zero Year" less about the moments of Batman becoming Batman and more about Bruce Wayne figuring out how to introduce Batman into Gotham City, which I loved. And not enough can be said about Capullo, whose cartoonish-yet-gruesome pencils perfectly match the tone of this series.

East of West

Jonathan Hickman loves world building. He clearly takes time to develop a rich cast of characters and a world in which they can play. This can sometimes be a fault, as seen in this year's Infinity event he did for Marvel. The event required audiences to have read the main event books as well as Hickman's entire runs on both Avengers and New Avengers. Unfortunately, I simply didn't have the money to buy all these books, and so I had to miss out. But all this is why I'm so glad East of West exists. Instead of readers needing a thorough knowledge of the Marvel Universe and three different series, they can just pick up one brand new title and be introduced to an incredible story with beautiful art by Nick Dragotta. The plot is about the three of the four Horsemen of the Apocalypse trying to track down and kill Death, all taking place in a futuristic America in an alternate timeline where no one really won the Civl War. It has both Western and Sci-Fi - I'm sorry, am I losing you? I promise it's not as hard to remember as it sounds. Being a new title, East of West dips its readers' feet into its waters at just the right pace to tell one of the most creative tales of the year. And at $10, you'd be stupid not to pick it up.

Favorite of 2013: The Wake

Another Scott Snyder book, I know. Where Batman showcased his ability to write with an existing character, The Wake exhibits Snyder's creativity. The book is about...well, it's...it's about mermaids. But think less of Ariel and Ursula and more of The Cabin in the Woods. These are killer creatures with an awesome design if you're into monsters and the like, and it's all done with Sean Murphy's jagged, intense artwork. If there's one thing I love more than the concept, it's the presentation. Most of The Wake's story is told like an action-horror movie, not unlike John Carpenter's The Thing. Scientists go underwater to examine a creature, the creature isn't happy, and things go badly. That's not to say the book is predictable by any means. But the last page makes a genre flip that really took me by surprise. Again, this one's only 10 bucks. I promise, it's really friggin' cool.

Consistently Great Series I Hope You Haven't Forgotten About Yet:

Green Arrow
Written by Jeff Lemire
Art by Andrea Sorrentino

Saga

Written by  Brian K. Vaughan

Art by Fiona Staples

Hawkeye
Written by Matt Fraction
Art by David Aja, Francesco Francavilla
and Matt Hollingsworth

Uncanny Avengers

Written by Rick Remender

Art by John Cassaday, Daniel Acuna

and Steve McNiven

Games

Gone Home

If I'm being honest, I was not as impressed with Gone Home as other people. It's way too short at just a couple hours (yes, I dug through everything I could find), especially considering the $20 price, which seems like a bit much, and the presentation of the story might let you leave a few stones unturned. But in discussions of games as legitimate and unique storytelling devices, this should be at the top of the list. Everything in Gone Home complements the story - level design, aesthetics, game progression - everything. It's unfortunate that with that statement I can't really say more about the plot, because spoilers are an issue. But I can say I appreciate how this story was presented. Scattered documents and audio diaries let you piece together how events in this family went down, as opposed to the game outright telling you. While it wasn't the most fun I had all year, Gone Home is a big step forward for game narratives.

Grand Theft Auto V

I hope my previous post about this game didn't sound too negative. Yeah, GTAV has a lot of issues with storytelling: unlikeable characters, odd shifts in tone, misplaced cynicism, lack of respect of women, etc. But, if you're willing to look past these missteps, GTAV is one amazing game. The story itself is a great crime epic. The missions are almost always consistently great and are a perfect level of insane. Oh yeah, and the world is damn impressive. It's massive, sprawling, varied, engaging and a bunch of other cool adjectives. Am I rambling? Probably, but you should definitely give this one a few dozen hours of your time.

Lego Marvel Superheroes

I know the Lego games receive flak for their less-than-stellar gameplay. It's mostly running from one area to the other while punching the scenery and picking up money. Even so, I've loved these games since the very first Lego Star Wars, for which I'd wake up an hour early to get in a level before school. So it delights me to know that the games keep expanding with more and more detail. Marvel Superheroes is the biggest yet, with some ungodly number of characters and some ungodly number of side missions and collectibles. While the "Find studs to unlock characters to reveal more characters you need studs for" game loop isn't that complicated, it's scarily addicting. The other night, a buddy and I played this for nine hours - 7 pm to 4 am. Nine. Hours. And this series is keeping couch co-op alive, so that's awesome too.

Rogue Legacy

Like Lego Marvel Superheroes, Rogue Legacy is a great example of how a great game loop realized by tight controls and rewarding gameplay can, by their powers combined, form an awesome experience. You pick a character with weird, quirky traits that affect the gameplay just enough. You fight monsters and pick up gold. You die. You buy upgrades and new equipment. Then you do it all over again. And it's amazing. Even though it doesn't have a deep, nuanced story or doesn't push the medium forward in some new, edgy way, Rogue Legacy is simply one of the most fun games I've played in a while. It's a great way to achieve that "gamer zen" you hear about from time to time.

Favorite of 2013: Bioshock Infinite

Ken Levine, you magnificent beast. I couldn't even begin to suggest how this game came together, with it being one of the most creative and revolutionary outings in modern gaming (yeah, give me at least one groan-worthy statement). The narrative is fascinating, original, detailed, fleshed out to an insane degree, and it all comes to life through superb voice acting from Troy Baker and Courtnee Draper. It's beautiful: graphics are crisp and the art direction stands alone. It's use of music is fantastic, and at times it creatively catches you off guard. And it's fun. I love the swashbuckle-y action, the inclusion of the skyhooks and the unique vigor powers. But Infinite's take on the adventure epic and, eventually, games in general is my favorite game story of the past year. I don't really want to talk more about it other than to say that if you have yet to play Bioshock Infinite, you should go change that. I'll leave you with one of Infinite's great songs and my personal favorite use of a song in a video game:

Movies

With all the time I wasted putting off the last part of this list, I actually had time to come up with some sort of structure for it. So here are my five favorite movies of the year, in order.

Frozen

Frozen's ad campaign could've done better. Before the movie's release, very little of the advertising helped convey what made Frozen unique, and it appeared to be just another cookie cutter product off the family animation assembly line. But, if you haven't heard by now, Frozen is pretty great. The animation is solid (if not just a little uncreative), the voice cast performs well, and the soundtrack - it's a good soundtrack. Songs have a nice Broadway feel to complement the singers (Idina Menzel is a standout, with solid props going to Josh Gad as well). Yet, even with how good the soundtrack is, one of my favorite aspects of Frozen is what it does with its story. What begins as a woman's quest to get her sister back evolves into something of an examination and update of Disney's princess formula. It's a good step forward for the genre as well as one of the most enjoyable movies from the past holiday season.

The World's End

Edgar Wright is quickly becoming one of my favorite directors. I love the emphasis he puts on editing and effects (both practical and animated), and his direction of action sequences in Scott Pilgrim and now The World's End has to be seen to be believed. It's this along with the expert acting and solid script that make the movie great. The Simon Pegg-Nick Frost duo has never been better. Frost gives everyone a nice change of pace from his usual slacker role by trading places with Pegg's straight man. And this is easily some of Pegg's best work. His role is a very grounded and raw one, and he gives the emotional depth that many other comedies are sorely lacking. And The World's End is really funny. It's a comedy, so I guess I should say that too.

American Hustle

American Hustle does right what many other movies fail to do: tell an extensive story that never loses steam or the interest of the audience. As long as you have a decently resilient bladder, the blink-and-you-might-miss-it type of storytelling is really rewarding, even on Hustle's generous runtime. David O. Russell's previous two films showed that he's an excellent director of actors, and that skill shows its face here. Each character is distinct and memorable, and they're all met with strong offerings by Hustle's small but talented cast. It's a shame not many people saw this when it debuted, because this is easily one of the best movies of the year. And it won Best Comedy at the Golden Globes, so good job or whatever.

The Wolf of Wall Street

If you've ever wondered what makes a great director, watch The Wolf of Wall Street. This movie has a very strong style and vision, all carried out by Martin Scorsese, the guy with the eyebrows. Only he could make a three-hour movie that leaves you wanting more (It's like the anti-Her). That all comes from Wolf's theme of excess - too many drugs, too many hookers, too many no-no words. Everything about the movie burns an image in your mind as well. This is one of those I saw a couple weeks ago that I'm still thinking about. But that might be from the...interesting imagery and colorful language Wolf relishes in. But hey, morals aren't everything.

Favorite of 2013: Pacific Rim

Only release of the year that made me clap and cheer during the movie. 10/10. Would recommend.

So cool.

American Hustle Review: Pimpin' Ain't Easy

I walked into American Hustle not knowing much about it, other that its high score on Rotten Tomatoes (which, let's face it, has become a necessity when debating a night at the theater). I enjoyed Director David O. Russell's last couple of films, but I wasn't exactly sure what to expect, since no one had given out many plot details. Now I know why: This movie is friggin' complicated.

If you need some background information without treading into spoiler territory, here's the deal. Irving Rosenfeld (a...rounder Christian Bale than what we're used to) is a con artist who specializes in fraudulent loans. He meets Amy Adams' Sydney, another hustler who pretends to hustle in a British fashion. Their hustle gets out-hustled by Bradley Cooper's FBI agent Richie DiMasso, who then hustles them into hustling a corrupt New Jersey Mayor (Jeremy Renner). Soon enough, everyone's hustling everyone with a side of fresh hustle.

On paper, this story should be a mess. Yet, American Hustle paces itself so well that it seems as if Russell is walking you through the story while holding your hand and telling you you're pretty. As long as you're paying attention for the 2.5 hour runtime, you should be cool.

I'd love to discuss the story more, but I can't really give that much away without spoiling anything. Plot details are unveiled little by little, and every little bit of the dangling carrot makes you want to know more about the characters and what they all really want in the end.

All of this is pulled off really well by the characters. I've recognized Russell for his work with his actors, because he always gets the performances out of them that best suit the movie. The standouts here are Louis C.K. as DiMasso's boss (Did you know he was in this? Me neither.) and Jennifer Lawrence in her true-to-Internet-folk-hero-status as Rosenfeld's probably-not-sane wife (Yes, he has a wife an a girlfriend. No, it doesn't make sense at first). And Amy Adams greatly captures that "Will they/Won't they" dynamic - not with a love interest, but rather in regards to "Will her boobs fall out of her shirt or won't they?"

Rated R for giving teenage boys funny ideas.

There isn't really much else that needs to be said about American Hustle. It's written, acted, shot and edited well; the period is well-represented by the production design and phenomenal music. Really, you should go see this one before awards season comes around.

Speaking of awards season, what are your picks for the best 2013 had to offer? I'm planning on putting together not a top X list, but rather a list of things I thought were interesting that happened to come out in 2013. But that won't be for a few more weeks since I'm giving myself more time to actually experience what came out in 2013.

Catching Fire Review: A Day at the Death Beach

I know this movie came out on Thursday, and today is Wednesday. Most of you probably saw this already and won't care what I have to say. But if you were as on the fence as I was about seeing yet another adaptation of a young adult bestseller, then you might want to listen up.

The Hunger Games: Catching Fire is miles ahead of its predecessor, and it's a great example of how to fix a franchise before it falls too far.

I was pretty skeptical going into this one. While I enjoyed the books (the first two, at least), the first movie was nothing short of a disappointment. The camerawork was sloppy, the runtime was bloated, the action was incredibly difficult to follow and the character performances hardly lived up to what the books put in my mind. Fortunately, Catching Fire pumps some life into the franchise before it can become a series of misfires.

Granted, some issues still rear their ugly heads, with the most notable being the movie's length. Catching Fire is a whopping two and a half hours, and it's not hard to feel that time wear on. This comes from the movie being a pretty faithful adaptation of the novel and sticking to its arbitrary structure. If you aren't aware, each book is split up into equal thirds of something, something and something else. If one something isn't as interesting as another something, well tough tortoises. Suzanne Collins is not one for structure, as you can see on her website.

But she is one for creepy rubber rats. I didn't read to see why.

Fortunately, though, the movie's two and a half hours are peppered with something great that way too few movies attempt to include these days: those little throwaway moments that serve to flesh out the characters and give them life outside the plot. I'd credit these - and the rest of the film's greatness - to the franchise's new director, Francis Lawrence. You know, the guy hot off the success of...Water for Elephants?

I know you forgot about this movie. But the elephants never forget.

I'm so glad The Hunger Games finally found a director who knows what he's doing. You can easily tell he had a hand in revamping the once-nauseating action scenes and giving the quasi-science fiction universe a more cohesive vision. And I commend him for getting decent performances out of the actors who felt pretty underutilized in the first movie. It's nice to finally see that Katniss is a smart and strong heroine rather than constantly just being told she is, and now there's reason to want these people to succeed.

If you like the series, you've probably seen the movie by now. If you were on the fence like I was, I really want you to give this one a shot. The last movie was perhaps a big turnoff, but Catching Fire finally gives reason to all the hype. So go see it or whatever.

What did you think of this movie compared to the last one? How do you think Mockingjay will turn out? Especially because, well, it's Mockingjay. I had a long talk with some friends about how I want to be excited for the franchise after how good Catching Fire was, but I can't because...Mockingjay. Let me know what you think in the comments, I want to chat. And there's no reason for you not to - I'm sure you've had a Google+ account rammed down your throat by now.

Happy Console War, Everyone! Here's Something Terrifying.

Thor: The Dark World Review: Like a Hit to the Face from MeowMeow

By now, there's an undeclared deal we all have with Marvel Studios: We give them our time and money, and they give us a string of movies that both introduce and revitalize fan-favorite characters from decades-old comics. These movies have also been of a consistent quality - even when they're not great, they're still good. I put the original Thor in that area, and I'd put the new sequel there as well. But while The Dark World isn't amazing, it's surprisingly fascinating.

In an effort to write reviews that lack flow, I'm going to switch gears for a second and familiarize you newcomers. Thor: The Dark World continues Marvel's "Phase Two" of movies, meaning that this is a continuation of both Thor's story and the overarching plot of the other Avengers-related movies. But whereas Iron Man 3 focused on the fallout of the New York incident, Thor 2 takes aim at the thunder god's new perspective on humanity and his obligation to protect them. This happens by way of an incredibly boring opening monologue from Odin about some dark elf with some weapon that's been locked away for some amount of time. Honestly, you won't really care about the main villain. Just know that the action's great, the settings are beautiful, the score is epic, and the movie is generally fun to watch. Oh, and there's Loki.

Pictured: One of the few Loki images not
involving hentai or someone's DeviantArt page.

If you haven't heard already, Tom Hiddleston's Loki spends some time in The Dark World, and he's easily the best aspect of the movie. It's either unbalanced writing or Hiddleston's presence that somehow makes the character who killed thousands of people the most likable one. The other actors do a fine job too, especially with their clear effort to make the otherworldly characters seem more human. However, a part of me wishes Kat Dennings and series newcomer Zachary Levi were the only other characters going for laughs. With everyone constantly trying to out-funny each other, you can tell they're among the few who know what they're doing.

So, I'd rather not continue my laundry list of the movie's elements. Instead, let's discuss my aforementioned fascination with The Dark World. It's common knowledge by now that Joss Whedon was brought in to "fix" the script. And you can tell.

"Who can take a sunrise, sprinkle it with dew..."

Thor 2 honestly feels like two films spliced together; and it's a job done well but not perfectly. When The Dark World is good, it's absolutely awesome. When it's not, it's really not. And the seams are very clearly visible. Certain scenes are incredibly written and immensely enjoyable. The action is great, and it all feels very appropriate in the world of Thor. Yet, other scenes are laughable mush that feel lazily put together. Several action scenes feel stolen from Star Wars. Yes, I meant Star Wars. I know it's a Thor movie, but apparently the director thought The Dark World needed space ships, laser turrets, black hole grenades and speeder chases. The dialogue feels even more unfitting. The best example is the scene where Odin makes a dismissive laugh that lacks anything I've ever seen on the emotional spectrum. If you're good with PhotoShop, please make it a gif and send it to me.

It goes without saying that you should see Thor 2, regardless of its really weird quirks and shortcomings. It's still a decent Marvel movie and it's awesome in the superhero department. Just know that you're not alone if some of it seems off.

The GTA V Q&A CTMTS

You're probably wondering where I've been the past few months. You've probably wondered if I've been brutally murdered after finding myself in debt to the Underground Ostrich Racing League (UORL). I have. I'm writing this from another plane of existence.

But we have more pressing matters to discuss. Grand Theft Auto V was released about a month ago, and, naturally, one would think a guy who writes about prevalent pop culture odds and ends would have a few words to say. And I do, now that I've actually finished the main campaign and can talk from a place other than my butt. Although, admittedly, it's a nice butt - just misinformed in a few areas. Since I, the writer, and you, the reader, lead very busy lives, I don't have time to carefully construct an in-depth article about GTA V, the game. Instead, here's a quick blow-by-blow question-and-answer setup with several queries I see often asked about the game along with my responses. So basically, heres a page of me talking to myself - kinda like Garfield without the Garfield. Oh yeah, there's spoilers, too.

It's the saddest thing you'll read without "Nicholas Sparks" in the byline.

I'm poor/stupid and haven't picked up the game yet. Should I?

Yes. GTA V is one of the most fun games I've ever played. It takes the immersive world of GTA IV and removes all the grittiness that took the joy out of that game. Missions range anywhere from assassinating a CEO to flying a biplane into another larger plane and then jumping out of that plane. I might be underselling it, but this game is mad creative. The world of Los Santos alone is worth the price of admission. It's about a 10 minute plane ride from one side of the map to the other - that's really freaking big if you're confused. And it's so crammed with secrets and side-missions that you could easily spend a day exploring.

Is GTA V misogynistic?

Absolutely. The series continues to feature male protagonists while presenting the only female characters as idiots or prostitutes. And the only serious woman in the game gets killed - in spectacular fashion, might I add. While I continue to play and see unimportant female characters, I also get the idea that the lovely designers at Rockstar don't really have an interest in adding more women. The world seems content with its depiction of each sex.

Did the torture mission go too far?

Yes, there's a mission that requires you to torture a man for information. No, it's not fun in anyway. And if I'm being honest, I don't think it really worked, even in the game's context. GTA V attempts to make a statement about torture as the mission wraps up, trying to say how torture doesn't work and it's only for the empowerment of the torturer. Nevertheless, it still puts the subject in mini-game form, and everything ends up as a really mixed message. The whole event seemed like a misfire to me.

Should Grand Theft Auto V win Game of the Year?

At this point, I don't really care about game of the year awards. For a long time, GOTY was won by whichever title had the most explosions or the badassiest characters. Now, that's all gone out the window. The Walking Dead threw a wrench into the whole operation by winning a number of GOTY awards and by being a point-and-click downloadable adventure game. This let me realize that there's no point into throwing such different titles together into one pool and deciding which one is objectively the best.

But if you had to ask me, I'd still go with BioShock Infinite for game of the year. Yeah, remember that one from way back in March? It's still in my head for having one of the best stories in gaming, told in a way only games could. And the actual gameplay of it isn't anything to sneeze at. I found myself several times having to take a moment to catch my breath after the big set piece battles. Most of that's from being overweight, but a good portion was caused by the sheer fun of the game. Lastly, Infinite did something GTA V never could - feel things. Like emotional things.

[SPOILER] It made Booker feel questionable things.

So there's a few of my thoughts on one of the biggest games to ever be released. Until the next undetermined time, stay classy, friends.

The man who killed me is named Eddie Thomas. Bring him to justice.

Do You Have a Minute to Talk About Our Lord and Savior Ben Affleck?

I've lost count at the number of articles linked from my reading list of websites referencing the recent casting news that BEN AFFLECK is your new Dark Knight. "Why Batfleck is the Worst Casting Ever." "Why Ben Affleck is a Brilliant Choice as Batman." "Obama is a Muslim and Other Secrets the Liberal Media Isn't Telling You." It all runs together.

Even more so than the number of articles I've seen is the number of people who have asked me what my opinion is on the casting. And yet, I always have a simple-yet-eloquent answer for them: "I could not care less."

This is a picture of people installing floor tile.
I care about it more than Ben Affleck.

Now, it's not that I have anything against Ben Affleck. He's shown us that he has acting ability, and the Oscar speaks for his talent as a director. No, this article isn't about how him being Batman will turn our children gay and destroy our crops. Furthermore, I think we can stop hating on him by now, especially about Daredevil. There were other people involved. And if it brought Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner together, it can't all be for naught.

Daredevil's other superpower is true love.

Actually the reason I have an insane amount of apathy for this development is that I have absolutely no interest in where DC's cinematic universe is heading. Most people know by now that I hate Man of Steel more than most members of the Taliban. Zack Snyder created a world that was way too dark for its own good and managed to take all the fun out of superhero movies. That being said, I simply don't have any interest in spending any more time in that world than I already had to. Adding a "Dark Knight" to an already dark Superman sounds like the most depressing two hours I could spend in a theater.

I've also been thinking recently of something a friend of mine said. He told me that he hopes Hollywood stops making superhero movies for at least a decade. While that sounds weird, let me explain on his behalf. What he meant was that superhero movies are on overdrive right now - anyone could see that. He believes that if they continue to be made, they'll never be made again after this phase of filmmaking is over. No new, imaginative director or writer will get to try his or her hand at making a Spider-Man or a Wonder Woman, and the public won't get to experience it.

I agree with him, to a degree. Warner Bros. and 20th Century Fox should definitely take a hiatus. I throw in Fox there because the constant stream of X-Men films has been decent, but nothing mind-blowing. I saw The Wolverine this summer; it was good, but it really didn't need to exist. Nobody wanted another movie where Hugh Jackman is angry.

On the contrary, Disney's Marvel Studios should continue full steam ahead. The team there is on a roll, and for once, characters like the Avengers are finally being put onscreen in the right way. And, oh yeah, those movies are actually fun to watch.

No, I won't boycott the new movie - I might even see it. I just can't get excited for it. It won't be a fun experience, either as a team-up movie or a springboard for a JLA film.

But hey, I'm willing to be pleasantly surprised.

Jumping Into Obscurity

It's no secret I spend way too much money and time on comics. My summer job literally gave me no more than four shifts in the past three months, and yet every single paycheck went straight to catching up on my chosen series. And when it comes to series, I could definitely do with fewer. I have my DC mainstays Batman and Justice League, my Marvel team books like X-Men and Guardians, and my critical darlings Hawkeye and Saga - you know, when Brian K. Vaughan feels like putting out an issue.

C'mon, dude. It's not like you're busy growing hair.

Okay, that was mean. Nevertheless, Saga's been my go-to source for the weird and out-there, and its hiatus is starting to take its toll. So this week, I chose to go out and grab some indie series, and the results have been, well, pretty weird and out-there. Here's a few series that just debuted and are definitely worth checking out.

First up is Josh Fialkov and Joe Infurnari's The Bunker. I absolutely adored Fialkov's recent handling of the gone-too-soon I, Vampire, and he definitely shows his effectiveness with this new digital title. His usual sense of humor is still present, even if the subject matter is much darker than what he usually portrays. While I haven't seen any of Infurnari's work, he does a fine job with cartoonish yet gritty illustrations here. The Bunker revolves around a group of friends hanging out in a forest (Is that what friends do?) when they come across a mysterious bunker underground. What follows is a great mystery with some time travel and an apocalypse thrown in for good measure. The jump into this world can be a bit jarring, so I recommend giving the issue two reads so you can get your bearings. The Bunker's first issue is available digitally for only $1.99, so it's not that much of a gamble to get into what seems to be a promising story.

The next title I'd actually recommend not reading digitally, but rather in print, like our Amish brethren. Trillium, written and illustrated by Jeff Lemire, features a gimmick that doesn't feel that much like a gimmick: The book asks that you read one of its two converging story lines and then turn the book upside-down to read the other. I love it when creators take advantage of their media, and seeing this in something as simple as a print book doesn't happen as much as you'd think. As I mentioned before, Trillium involves two plots and two different characters coming together in what's been advertised as a time-travelling love story.

Love it.

A friend of mine recently turned me on to some of Lemire's work. I absolutely loved what I've read so far of Sweet Tooth, another book in which he's also illustrated. Jeff Lemire's artistry may appear strange at first glance, but it definitely grows on you - also, watercolors are pretty.

Finally, I have for you a little something that you may find stranger than the last two. I give you Burn the Orphanage. This one's been on my radar for a while, because it's called FREAKING BURN THE ORPHANAGE. However, this is not only the best band name of all time. It's also a great homage to classic games like Street Fighter and Double Dragon which you either grew up playing or (if you're my age) lied and told everyone you totally played them even though you were in no way old enough. Burn the Orphanage also has a sense of melodrama with its story you can't help but love. Characters and dialogue are exaggerated, and the action even more so. The plot isn't that involved, but that's why I gave you the last two comics. If you wanted thought-provoking stories, you grab Trillium and The Bunker. If you want kick decapitations, a guy named Bear with the literal heart of a bear, and stripper ninjas, you pick up Burn the Orphanage.

There's just a few indie series for you to try. I chose them because these issues that just released are the #1s, and thus a great jumping on point for interested readers. If you guys have any indie series for me to read, I'd love to dive into something a little more obscure than my regular superhero title. Put your recommendations in the comments.